Wise Matchmaking Blog

What Would Trent Walker Do With Facebook? How Would Swingers Fare With Modern Technology?

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We adored this article on Nerve.com exploring whether social media has killed the now-famous “three day rule” exposed by Vince Vaughn’s character, Trent Walker in Swingers.  While it may still be tempting to wait a few days to call a girl after a date, what happens when you are already Facebook friends and you want to comment on a status?  Is that a violation of the “three day rule?”  This all begs the question – how long should you wait before adding a date as a friend on Facebook?

At Wise Matchmaking, we generally don’t advocate adding someone as a friend on Facebook until after you’ve met face-to-face (see our earlier post about not googling your first date!). But what about after a first date?  If the sparks don’t fly but you have a nice time, there is no harm in adding your date as a Facebook friend.  The more friends you have, the more people you know who can potentially introduce you to the love of your life!  So, if you and your first date don’t click romantically but otherwise enjoy each other’s company, leaving the door open to a future friendship is always a good idea and Facebook is a great way to maintain contact with people.

But if you are casually dating more than one person, beware of what you put on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or any other social networking site.  Pictures of you on a date with one person can sour a blossoming relationship with another.  You can and should play the field until you find Mr. or Miss. Right but be wary about how much of your “playing” is broadcast to the public.

We’ve come a long way in the last 20 years.  We wonder what Trent and his buddies would do today.  Would they add a girl on Facebook after the first date?  Or wait three days?

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